The Day I Believed…………

I have received many questions about my religion and I have to say it’s not easy to give you an answer, as to be true I don’t think I have a religion. 
I believe in God would be more accurate. An in the Power of Love. I posted on this a couple of months ago – You can find my post HERE.

In 2009 I went through a very difficult phase in my life. After coming back from a week in Morocco, I was completely lost, not finding my place in Dublin, not finding the peace I had found in Morocco, aware there was a gap between the two cultures, a gap I was unable to fill. 

In March 2009 I met the one who is now my husband. But at the time, conflicts were on with family, I couldn’t find my place in our relationship, I was living in total darkness, not knowing what to say, where to go, what to do. My head was full of fears and doubts. I was moving, making new step with much efforts, feeling like a ghost in my own skin, not belonging to any place. I wanted to fall for somebody to look at me, to see my pain, to guess I couldn’t do it anymore, not like this. But I knew even if I fell down, nobody would see it. I would still have to fight alone. 

And on a particular day of August, I remember myself in my new apartment, in tears, sit down on the cold floor looking at the emptiness in front of me, thinking “If every struggle could stop today”, my eyes looking at the balcony and the grass beneath it. It could go smooth. I could escape the world in one second. I could stop the nightmare just by jumping in the air. 
It was tempting. 

At the second I was about to give up, I felt something around me, like a warm presence. I was not alone. So, no I didn’t hear a voice or see a face, but deep down I felt I was not alone. And then God said to me wherever you are, whatever struggle you face, I am with you, I have your hand in mine and I will not let go. 
Now you want to jump, it’s fine, go. It’s your choice, it’s your life.
But if you decide not too, remember I will not let go of your hand. I will always be with you, no matter what.

I trusted him. I knew he was right. I started to pray and I have to say I faced others challenges since then, I will face other ones in my life but I know God is always there and through prayers I can meet him, find peace in his unconditional love, let go of my pains and weaknesses, stand up and start again.
God told me this. 
You can raise again from the bottom of the hole. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Trust in his Love and you will see it. 



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15 thoughts on “The Day I Believed…………

  1. so true sis..we have our own life struggles but there will always be hope..God has always been there loving us again and again..sometimes our lives seems to be inside a dark cocoon but as time passes by when we are ready to face the world..out we come and see ourselves as a beautiful butterfly.it is a part of our inner maturity sis..you know my story and I have been through a lot but now I am smiling..and realized God never left me and my kids..He sees every cry sis..and in time those tears will be turned to tears of joy because we have survived every step of our lives 😉 *hugs sis*

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  2. So beautifully penned, Marie! My eyes remained captive throughout the entire post 🙂 My beliefs mirror yours very accurately ~ I see myself as being more of a spiritual person than a religious one, believing in a higher power, which is God. I so often find myself being very confused about all the many religions out there and the chaos it causes in our world. A beautiful post, indeed and thank you for sharing 🙂

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  3. hey marie,yes God is always with us and we should know that, no matter what…God will always be there for us. God forgives again and again. I think the problem with us getting like this is our soul. Since we all have the need to worship the one God, and if we dont practice it regularly, this is what makes us fall apart, the fact that we are not remembering God. A lot of people believe in God but they don't really put that into practice, this is why Action comes after belief. It is only God that wants us to feel safe and warm from this cold dangerous world. This is why in Islam, we have Ibadaah (which means action in worship) that comes after belief in one God. =] You feel more alive…Everyone passes through hard trials, I hope we are able to overcome them by God's help. I was tempted to jump off the balcony once because i thought i was useless in my frozen life with issues. But Praise God, this is a stupid idea, to end ur life , u dont know whats coming next. Good post to remind myself too, thanks I love the quote at the end, it touched me. This comment was kinda long lol =3Take care Marie <3xxxxxxxxxHug

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  4. Pieces of Sunshine, that is a good resume! Thank you for visitingSie, we always stand up again don't we. Because there is a force around us, that push us to move, that don't allow us to give up. After darkness comes the light and this is something I know for sure. xxxPetite, Thanks!Mehreen, He is always testing us but always there at the same time – If we put all our trust in him we can even see light through total darkness, appreciating each moment whether they feel good or bad. Take care.Shreya, Glad you appreciated it. Love your blog by the way!Galen Pearl, Thank you for your kind words. I think we all have personal stories. way we see things, that could inspire others.Stay well & happy you liked it.Lady Fiona, how nice! I am a bit lost too, many religions and beliefs and still Peace ins on a threshold.Thanks Dana, not long at all, I love the way you write things. Remember I am always happy for a guest post if you wish!! xx

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  5. You said it right. God would prefer to hold your hand rather than you holding His..for in times of trouble, you might let go of His, while He won't let go of yours.Haven't read your old post yet (but i will), though i guess it might speak about love, hurting love perhaps(?)Anyways, just this– True love doesn't make you feel lonely when you are alone, Companionship does. Feeling you are loved is different from “thinking” you are loved. As I always say, Love is not looking at each others' eyes, but looking at the same direction. It's not who can give more or take more. It doesn't tell- who is dominant or who knows better. It is simply, let's say –“meeting at the center”. kinda long, just a thought 🙂

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  6. You are wonderful for sharing this experience Marie. Life is not simply, and it certainly is not without God's mercy that we are here.Thank you for sharing this post with us…I love getting to know you and the other bloggers as well.XXOO

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  7. Beanizer, know that I love comments they are never too long.Love the first lines – very trueMy other post is about how I see myself in religion. God has been good with me, he has provided with this love that “doesn't make me feel lonely or empty when you are alone”. Instead I will inspired and with much love around me.Thank you for your visit and your words. I understand Sie now!!!

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  8. Salma, glad you liked it! Real experiences are sometime the ones that we can relate too better. It;s a pleasure to share it with you all. Blogging has opened my world and helped me so much as I am meeting wonderful people every day , people I would not have the chance to meet otherwise. Stay well.

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  9. This is a beautiful testimony, Marie. I have always wanted to hear it, so thank you for sharing it! I am so proud to have you as a sister in faith and in Christ – and I cannot wait to give you a big hug when I see you in Heaven someday!

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