Can’t force a man to be…

You can’t force a man to be anything he does not want to be. You can’t force a woman either.

Change comes from WITHIN.

It you want to be that special person, you’ll do anything to be this person. You’ll be the change. You won’t beg anybody to change so it fits your world. At the end of the day it does not work. We are the only actors of our life.

You can’t force a man to be a good friend or a good husband. You can’t ask him to do this or that. If he does not want to do it, he won’t do it. And if he does it, he will be resentful towards you for having been forced into doing it.

You can’t force a man into being someone he is not. You won’t change him. Come on, you know it by heart and still you hope, you hope he might be different cause of you. This does not work either. Some people don’t even see good people around them; they don’t understand the meaning of compromise or what’s in the word LOVE.

You can’t force a man to be a dad. Parents have rights. But they also have duties. You are not a dad because you have a child. You can be call dad when you do something for your child, when you love your child unconditionally, when you are ready to make efforts for him or her, when his interests come before your own little life, when you are able to let go of anger for his or her sake.

You can’t change someone, just because you wish that person to be acting like you do. You can’t let them see what they don’t want to see or listen to what you have to say, when they are not ready to open their ears.

You can’t ask them to make an effort when they don’t want to make any, when they don’t think it’s up to them to make any.

You have much power into your hands but this power can only help people who are ready to be helped, the ones who know that’s something is wrong, the ones who are ready to take the plunge for a better life, the ones who ask for help, the ones ready to change.

Each person is responsible for his / her own life.

Your duty is to preserve your life, not let people mold you or change you into somebody you’re not. Some might follow you, shine with you.

Others might avoid you, despise you. This is  THEIR problem. You can’t change the deal. You can’t change THEM.

The only thing you can do is CHANGE the way you are dealing with it and decide once and for all that you won’t step down, that you won’t let people walk over you anymore.


Source – Pinterest



9 thoughts on “Can’t force a man to be…

  1. Hi Marie,

    We do change for each other if we love, if our love is not demanding, if it focuses all the time on giving.
    We do change for our children, to set an example, to give them the best, to give them all our love, which they deserve.
    We do change with time, we become more tolerant, more resilient, more loving if our love is reciprocated.
    I sincerely hope you will find real love, one day.


  2. The onus seems to fall on the woman to take charge by really putting herself on the backburner – quite the paradox. I do believe like Balroop says that it is all possible, when it is not demanding or forced. Change is growth – we shouldn’t lose when we change.

    I do believe it has to come from both side, because anyone who keeps taking without giving is NEVER going to see it any other way. And the person who keeps giving without asking for anything in return will also get caught in the loop of never giving enough…being enough…or doing enough. *Sad*



  3. A person can change for the sake of the person(s) s/he loves if and only if they truly love them… we can even change for our own sake if we do love ourselves. Something in your words bring tears to my eyes Marie!!!! I have a friend who is so much abused by everyone around her and I feel helpless :(. Your words always remind me of her… she really breaks my heart.


  4. Hello chère Marie

    S’il ne veut pas changer un homme ne fera aucun effort pour évoluer
    Mais des hommes “bien” existent, il faut que tu en restes persuadée.

    GROS BISOUS d’Asie pour vous deux
    JE PENSE FORT A VOUS et je vous souhaite le meilleur


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