The life we choose

@MarieKleber

Nothing ever prepared us to live a life that was not meant for us. We spent years trying to figure out what the world wants, how to be accepted, recognized, how to fit in. And one day we discover that all of this, is complete builshit.

Our truth lies in childhood fun and dreams. It’s where it started and where it will end, only if we give ourselves the chance to let go of all limits we put on our path, of all “I should” we built, of all “not enough” we thought.

It’s not a matter of chance. It comes with understanding that the life we have has nothing to do with the life we want. It’s our choice to follow our heart or to keep going the way we do. It’s not right or wrong. It’s what appeal to us at a moment in time.

And we all know that one moment can change a whole life!

Knowing who we are

@ Marie Kleber

Each experience in life gives us a chance to know who we are. We are learning every day. We may fall. It happens to me many times. And I feel like all the steps before mean nothing. I am like this. Falling hard. And then standing up again. Darkness put aside. No more clouds around. Ready to enjoy every minute of every day. There is no time, then, to ponder on things I can’t change.

The world today does not want to hear that you don’t feel right, at one given time. It says to you that you have nothing to complain about, as long as you have a roof, money and health. So if you do so, be ready to face their wrath.

And if you don’t feel right today, what will become of you tomorrow? You ought to be grateful and let go. That’s simple, isn’t it?

But in truth, far from reality. Cause we are humans. We have emotions. We have to deal with people, our past, our fears, our personality, our dreams and our personal history. We have to compose with all these pieces of our lives every day. Feeling blue once doen’t mean we are on the verge of depression. It does not mean we are lost forever.

It just means that we are ready to face whatever feelings are coming our way. Not saying all is right when it’s not. Not burying our problems. But finding solutions. Before moving on.

The world has its own opinion. Of what is right or wrong.

We know there is no right nor wrong. That makes all the difference!

Let me be…me

Let me breath
Let me be

Not the way you imagined me
Just the way I am

Messy at times
Unsure of what to say
And how to say it

Loud and insecure
Raising my voice against things
You think are not worth fighting for

Let me see the best in others
Even if you think it’s naive

Let me go my way
Even if not the way you’d take

Let me smile and cry
And say some days are too much
I can’t cope and that’s fine
Tomorrow will be better

I know it would be easier for you
If I could fit in boxes
If I could follow a road that many took before
Knowing where the footprints are

But it would mean being someone I am not
I did it for too long
I don’t want it anymore…

Don’t close your eyes

Copyright Marie Kléber

It’s hard not to. Not to remember this night. Hard to see the number 13 on the screen and feel nothing. It’s hard to forget. Hard to behave like none of this happened.

We can try. Some are good at it. Some are good at closing their eyes. Some don’t want to remember. Cause it’s too tough. Cause it’s too soon maybe. Cause they don’t see why this would make a difference.

I don’t want to close my eyes. I don’t want to forget. Even if it makes me shiver. Even if it’s far from what I believe and pray for. Even if I don’t understand and if I’d rather see love than blood on the day screens.

I can say it does not matter. I was not one of them. I was out of the mess of this terrible night. I’d lie. I was there, crying, feeling the pain of those who died, of those who survived. I was there, knowing our world would never be the same again, letting go of layers of fears, trying to find solace in kid’s innocent smiles.

When darkness threatens the foundations of our lives, we can’t keep going like nothing is real. We ought to walk, confident, holding to hope like a second skin, towards the light.

Education is prevention…

…and prevention is protection.

Now-a-days, we hear a lot about violence. Violence at home, bullying at school, harassment at work or on the street. Violence is everywhere. It does not define our societies or who we are but it plays an important role in our evolution and how we decide to define ourselves.

In the past couple of years, the French government put into place important measures to fight all types of violence, creating adds to show its impact on peoples lives, opening more helplines, dedicated centres to welcome the victims, creating new jobs and training programs. Many well-known artists took it over and started campaigns around the country and in the world.

Still, I think something is missing in order, if not to eradicate violence completely, at least to change the vision of men and women on the subject and prevent violence from spreading even more. Before discussing the impact of violence, people first have to be educated on what violence is, how to spot it and how to protect themselves from it. MORE on WMB

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What would you have done?

If you mum would have come to you saying

“your dad better not find you there reading a book, when he comes home”

Would you have just said “ok”?

Would you have just asked “why? what’s wrong with reading a book”?

Would you have said “I don’t agree with this. What’s his problem? I can’t do what I want in my own home”?

Would you have said “no more of this bullshit. A man will never ever say to me what I should or should not do”?

Or would you have said “this is not my battle”?

****

If you mum had started crying and talking once again about her life, abused childhood, about her messed up married life, about how she is trying everything but no one sees it

Would you have taken her in your arms and say you’re sorry for creating such a mess around a single book?

Would you have told her “maybe you should leave dad”?

Would you have said “please stop with your childhood memories. I am fed up. I can’t take this anymore. We’ve been living with all this craziness since we’re kids. I can’t hear about it anymore”?

Would you have just stayed there and listen. And think “when all this will stop”?

What would you have done?

Would you have felt helpless?

Would you have asked yourself “how to set boundaries with all this mess coming around again and again and again”?

Do you know how to set boundaries, how to deal with this, without hurting yourself?

We are the change

But how to change? Where to start?

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For Freedom!

Freedom is a basic right

In France, Freedom of speech is an essential right

Yesterday at 11.30am

12 journalists were assassinated

Sketches v Kalashnikovs

They died for their ideas

Inside we cry

And the world cries with us

This should never happen

And it keeps happening

Blood stains on the walls

We will not let Freedom die

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Next time, I’ll chose love

First thing I experienced when meeting him is: FEAR

Fear of not being right

Fear of not being good enough

Fear of the unknown

Fear of not being as he wanted me to be

For 4 years, fear never left me

Fear of his silences

Fear of his presence

Fear of his absence

Fear of his words

Fear of his behavior

Fear of his violence

I say yes to marriage out of: FEAR

Fear of saying NO to him

Fear of slamming doors

Fear of funny faces

Fear of time and people met and phone calls done

Fear of being late

Fear of my words

Fear of my habits

Fear of my ideas and dreams

Fear of not saying the right thing at the right time

Fear of not wearing the right dress

Fear of being full of fear

***

Nothing good comes out of fear

Next time,  I’ll choose LOVE!

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Taking Sides

Some days, we must take sides.

We have to fight for

Peace

Justice

Respect

Freedom

Love

We have to fight against

Violence

Terror

Abuse

Hatred

Injustice

 

And then some days

We face small, tiny life challenges

People disagreeing

People being rude

People chatting behind other’s back

Rumors

Personal issues

Should we take someone’s side?

Or stay neutral?

Should we say “yes” to one and “no” to the other?

Should we add to the gossip?

Or should we remain silent?

 

It’s THEIR issues.

As long as these issues don’t affect our humanity or the humanity of the people involved…

 

What should we do?

Is there anything to do?

Won’t it be easier to realize that all this mess is not worth it?

Won’t it be easier to try our best to see the strengths of that person, behind all her/his weaknesses?

 

Why are we so good at making our lives miserable, as if there was not enough pain and suffering in this world?

I wonder.

What shall we do, when we face people not liking each other?

What shall we do, when we don’t own the problem?

Where shall we stand, when we don’t wish to be involved, when nobody is right or wrong?

Where shall we stand, when it’s all about the incompatibility of two characters?

I wonder.

 

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Can’t force a man to be…

You can’t force a man to be anything he does not want to be. You can’t force a woman either.

Change comes from WITHIN.

It you want to be that special person, you’ll do anything to be this person. You’ll be the change. You won’t beg anybody to change so it fits your world. At the end of the day it does not work. We are the only actors of our life.

You can’t force a man to be a good friend or a good husband. You can’t ask him to do this or that. If he does not want to do it, he won’t do it. And if he does it, he will be resentful towards you for having been forced into doing it.

You can’t force a man into being someone he is not. You won’t change him. Come on, you know it by heart and still you hope, you hope he might be different cause of you. This does not work either. Some people don’t even see good people around them; they don’t understand the meaning of compromise or what’s in the word LOVE.

You can’t force a man to be a dad. Parents have rights. But they also have duties. You are not a dad because you have a child. You can be call dad when you do something for your child, when you love your child unconditionally, when you are ready to make efforts for him or her, when his interests come before your own little life, when you are able to let go of anger for his or her sake.

You can’t change someone, just because you wish that person to be acting like you do. You can’t let them see what they don’t want to see or listen to what you have to say, when they are not ready to open their ears.

You can’t ask them to make an effort when they don’t want to make any, when they don’t think it’s up to them to make any.

You have much power into your hands but this power can only help people who are ready to be helped, the ones who know that’s something is wrong, the ones who are ready to take the plunge for a better life, the ones who ask for help, the ones ready to change.

Each person is responsible for his / her own life.

Your duty is to preserve your life, not let people mold you or change you into somebody you’re not. Some might follow you, shine with you.

Others might avoid you, despise you. This is  THEIR problem. You can’t change the deal. You can’t change THEM.

The only thing you can do is CHANGE the way you are dealing with it and decide once and for all that you won’t step down, that you won’t let people walk over you anymore.

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